Jim and I don’t fight over things that normal couples fight over. Things like money, disciplining the kids, where to eat, and on and on… We duke it out over the craziest things.
Demon Dog (aka Whiskey) has trained us to do things his way. This means we do things backwards when it comes to putting a leash on him. We never got him completely housebroke. We used the method where he was confined to a small space where he wouldn’t think of diddling because it was his own and then slowly expanded that space. And it worked! Well, we thought it worked, but soon realized it worked only to a certain point. Whiskey wouldn’t dream of diddling in the kitchen. It turns out the rest of the house is fair game.
We finally declared him the winner and implemented the leash law. When he is in the house he is confined to the kitchen, on our laps, or on the leash. When he is outside he can run to his heart’s content. I know, I know – that’s a little backwards, but we have a lot of property and he doesn’t wander far. He’s too chicken for that.
Here’s the twist. We used to open the front door to let him run to the kitchen. Then we discovered the little shit was hysting his hind leg between the front door and the kitchen to leave a little yellow squirt on the living room carpet as he passed through! Arghhh!!! So now we have to put the leash on him to take him inside. Can you say dumb dog.? Or more like, dumb people…
Why does this cause a battle? I like to put the leash on the table at the front door. That way I can pick it up on my way out to get Whiskey in, or if it is cold, I don’t have to go outside at all and can just open the door and let him in.
Jim likes to put the leash on the porch railing. I don’t know why and since this is my blog, he can’t tell you! So, he lets the dog out and the leash is left outside. I let the dog in and where is the leash… outside! This is especially irritating to me in the early morning or late at night because I’m always barefoot and have to put shoes on or walk outside barefoot.
Last night I hit the ceiling when at 10:30 I went to let the dog in. No leash. It was once again outside.
Me: Just once can’t you do things my way!
Jim: Huh? What?
Me: The leash! You left the leash outside!
Jim: So? That’s where I always leave it.
Me: I know!!!!! I’ve asked you a million times (I sometimes exaggerate) to leave it on the table inside, but will you do that? Nooooooooo!!!!!!! Can’t you just once do things my way! (yea, I repeated myself, but only about 100 times)
Jim: This isn’t about the leash. What’s really wrong?
Me: It is TOO about the leash! It is definitely about the leash!
More stupid stuff was said, all of which I regret – and all over a stupid leash.
At some point I stomped off to bed… in the guest bedroom. I can be so hard headed and stupid!I’d ask for everyone’s opinion on this, but I already know I’m right. The leash belongs inside and I’m hard headed and stupid! ;)