Monday, November 29, 2010

A love story

The nights would drag on as I sat with my dad, trying to keep mom from getting agitated.  As the evenings would close in, the night terrors would get worse.  As we’d talk, occasionally she would have a glint of recognition in her eyes and say something that could maybe apply.  But mostly she would wander, opening and closing drawers, look out the front door, then sit back down and start the routine all over again.
One such evening as the evening wore on, I asked dad how he and mom met.  This is the story he told me.
”We met at a restaurant across from Immaculate Conception Church.  My brother, Bill, and I would have lunch there.  Your mom and (Aunt) Jane would go there.  We’d follow them back down Miller Street.  You see, we lived on the same street with Oscar and Agnes, about four houses down from where your mom lived.

The night I asked your mom to marry me, we were driving the old red truck that they used to push cars around with [the Hood boys owned a garage].  It was a 29 Dodge with a hydraulic hook, and had Hood’s Garage written on it.  Your mom was wearing my signature ring, wrapped with tape so it wouldn’t fall off.  The date was December 13, 1946, Friday the 13th.  We went to Oscar’s Steakhouse on St. Louis Road. 

As we were leaving the restaurant I asked for my ring back.  She thought something was wrong and got very upset.   I told her ‘this ring won’t fit over it’ and gave her the diamond ring.
We were going to get married the next year, but her brothers Cy and Tony, and then her sister Jane all decided to get married.  This was too many weddings in one year.  So we waited until the next year.”

Ed & Margaret wedding

Among photos I have been scanning, I found hastily scribbled notes in my own handwriting from this conversation.  I had totally forgotten about it.  I remember now that the story is disjointed because of the number of times we would follow mom out of the room, bringing her back to the safety of the kitchen.  Damn Alzheimer’s!  But I am thankful that I have this much of the story. 

Their love story continued for 60 years, with dad showing the ultimate love of devotion, dedicating his life to caring for mom until the end.

18 comments:

Osage Bluff Quilter said...

How precious that you have those memories with your Dad and Mom regardless of her condition.

Funny in My Mind said...

Thank you, that was sad and sweet.
Write that memory down and pass it on.

That corgi :) said...

Oh Deanna, hugs to your dad for his dedication to taking care of your mother, and I'm sure he did it with love and respect for her, putting aside his needs in the process. Thank you for posting this beautiful love story, not only of how they met, fell in love, got married (that was neat they were willing to wait an extra year because of too many marriages, you know that was probably a bit of a sacrifice) but also of your dad's devotion to her. He loved her not just as an emotion, but as a verb, going the extra distance to help her the best he could. Glad you took notes of the conversation to remember in the days ahead. Alzheimer's and other associated dementias are so cruel indeed. It does take a very special person to be a caregiver to someone with Alzheimer's, that speaks volumes of the character of your father. Loved their picture too!

betty

Snappy Di said...

What a perfect photo! Don't you just love her shoes!

Di

AliceKay said...

Beautiful story. I'm glad you have this written down and that you have some wonderful photos to keep with you. Very nice photo of your parents.

jewelzmomof4 said...

Oh Mom I miss them both so much!!!! I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face. I miss them both so much but I know I am one Blessed woman for having such great Grandparents on Both sides of my family. I am going to write this story down so I will always have it to share with the boys. Dakota is always asking questions out of the blue about his family. He was amazed to find out BOTH his Great Grandpas on my side were in WWII (it was WWII right??) He is very curious about the history of his family. I love to be able to share things like this with him. You had some amazing parents and they raised you to be just as amazing.

Rita said...

Yes--now that is a love story! From the waiting a year to watching over her as her mind disappeared. Made me smile and cry at the same time. So glad you wrote down some notes so you would remember, too. Thanks sooo much for sharing this precious love story. :)

Toriz said...

That's a sweet story. It's obvious your parents were very much in love... I'm glad they found each other, and had so many happy years together. And also that you were able to take short notes so as to share their story with us. :)

The Farmer's Daughter said...

Hi Deanna! What a beautiful love story. The photo shows two people so very happy and they had to be so very much in love to wait an extra year to get married! They were very special parents and its great to have such wonderful memories written down.

Have a great day,
Cheryl

Missouri Gal Nicole said...

That's very sweet and I can picture it as you describe it. Sorry about her condition now but I'm glad you have the wonderful story of how they met!

Steve Skinner said...

What a great story, thanks for sharing it!

~Tonia said...

Beautiful story....

Intense Guy said...

*Hugs*

I got all shiny-eyed. :) Such a beautiful story... it sounds almost as if Hallmark Cards should make it into one of their really special movies... I can just see the old 1929 red truck with Hood's Garage on it... Your dad, a slender young man talking to his bride to be, sitting on the bench seat wrapped up in a coat against the winter chill...

...and years later... being there while the end came... without a regret other than it just couldn't go on forever...

...but it will... in a much nicer place.

jewelzmomof4 said...

Oh Iggy!!!! You just made ME get all shiny eyed LOL. That is so true their life could have been a Hallmark Movie!! They BOTH were remarkable and wonderful people!!!

Vicki Lane said...

A true love story . . . thanks for sharing it.

Queenie Jeannie said...

What a beautiful love story!! Big hugs!!!!

Rural Rambler said...

Very sweet story Deanna. I am always thinking of my Mom this time of year. She loved Christmas, she was just like a little kid. Christmas. Those memories. Sixty years Deanna, can you imagine? CH and I are heading for 37 in January! Goodness.

MarmiteToasty said...

Precious photos precious memories and a couple so much in love til the end..... perfect....

sad and sweet all in one post..

x